I wonder how much our genes determines our character and behavior and how much our environment does. How do I know how much of my habits and beliefs are genetically inherited from my parents and how much because I learned from them? Would I be who I am if I were raised by someone else? There are so many characteristics I see of theirs that I possess, and many I hope I never do. I have a tendency to be lazy, irresponsible, and procrastinate. That sounds like both of them. My mother received a notice from her home insurance that they will no longer insure the house because of some rather minor faults. Faults I don't think is reasonable to cease insurance, but they are an insurance company. She submitted a claim to replace part of an outside wall thats frame was rotted because of an old leak. Of course they denied it because it was "pre-existing" before she bought the house from my grandmother (sound familiar?). The inspector felt that he needed to relay that the paint was peeling on the outside, the gutters needed cleaning and probably replacing, and there was moss on the roof, thus they stopped coverage. I think to stop coverage over those small issues is unwarranted. My parents are trying to take care of those problems now, and have finished 1 1/2.
That's a picture Gramma and me. One of my favorite pictures. I really used to be thin! I was probably about a size 4. Now I can't fit into a 14. Getting old sucks.
However, I also blame my mother for all of the decay the house fell into. My grandfather died 19 years ago, this month actually...in the middle of my Halloween party...I regress. My grandmother didn't have a clue as to how to take care of a house or finances. She could clean a house, and cook in it, and read in it (always was a big reader), but knew nothing of making claims to the insurance companies, knowing when things needed to be replaced, how dangerous some faulty wiring can be. I wouldn't say the wiring is faulty, but it is over 50 years old. According to Carmen, she didn't even know how to pay bills. My mother never owned a house before, but she was really the only one around to help Gramma. There had to be things that she knew needed fixing, but she was always too busy (I admit I probably had a lot to do with that) and didn't want to deal with it and never got around to it until it became her house. Not wanting to deal with things is another fault of mine that I also find in both of my parents. My grandmother needs to be held accountable too: she could have taken initiative and made some calls, but she was already over 70 when Grampa died and I don't think was ever one to really take care of herself. Even with the rotted framing, Carmen swears she didn't think it was that bad, but it didn't surprise me at all. The paint inside the room, my room, my grandmother's former room, was bubbling out and created a large crack. I knew that something was very wrong and told my (at the time) fiance's mother about it, who's quite savvy when it comes to these things. The first words out of her mouth were, "Call the insurance company." My grandparents used Safeco (who's my mother's insurance until 11/26) for years and never filed a claim. I told Carmen the next day, and do you think she did a damn thing about it? That's a rhetorical question. That was five years ago! Maybe six. There's a good possibility that Safeco would've paid since Gramma owned the house for 35 years! The gutters were originally made of wood, so of course over the years they completely rotted. My dad replaced some of them, but there's still a lot that needs to be done. The oven is probably as old as the house. I'm afraid to turn that thing on. We have no dishwasher. There's not even a hook-up for the dishwasher because the house was built in the mid-fifties. These are all things that should be obvious to anyone, even Sarah Palin, that need to be taken care of. Perhaps not to a 70+ (who's now 90) year old, old-school grandma that never had to deal wtih anything like that and didn't know any better, but Carmen should've been a little wiser.
That damn crap coconut rum she bought gave me a headache, and I only had one drink. But maybe it's not that. It feels like someone took a dowel, poked it in my forehead, a little right of center, and it's going out the back of my skull.
I took a Vicodin and hope that will help. My back also gave me grief all day, so hopefully the Vicodin will help that as well. Enough complaining. It's not good for anything, except to vent some steam once in a while.
Maybe I'm being too harsh on her. Of course she was very upset when she read the letter and called her insurance agent, who can't find another company to cover her because of course they all know that Safeco cut her off. At first I said nothing and kept my eyes glued to Chris Matthews, solely and silently blaming her for her own misfortune. I eventually felt a little bad and told her that I was sorry Safeco did that to her. And I am. But she still shares some of the responsibilities in my eyes. I vowed to myself a while ago that I will always take care of my property, whether it's real estate, or a car, or a pet (tho I don't really consider pets as property, but you get the gist), and to not have it if I can't afford it. A mistake I made myself that cost me dearly, and a mistake both of my parents, and my grandmother made. Now we have an old house almost in disrepair (from my pov), three people who don't have jobs (although my seizures required me to quit my job and I go to school full time now), way too much stuff, and seven cats. Aye, aye, aye.
As closing comments, I want to express my congratulations to Obama, happy birthday to Bo, and my cat, Ligeia.
"Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced." ~James Baldwin
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